Why Phat is Not Where It's At
by Tony King
Not withstanding the suggestions of super-plus size (size 24) actress Mo' Nique and her box offer failure, the movie, "Phat Girls", when it comes to successful men seeking a wife, fat is not were it's at.
Having an attractive woman as a wife is a boost to a man's status as well as his ego.
It gives a man psychic gratification. It bolsters his self-esteem and builds up his image to the outside world. And, among other men, it implies that "the brother's got game. He must be doing something right to have such a beautiful woman."
And, the higher a man's socio-economic status the more important it is for him to have an attractive, fit, and sexy wife who carries herself with class. So, it is not surprising that high-income doctors, lawyers, businessmen, entertainers, and pro athletes typically have stunningly beautiful wives. And, when you think about it, you rarely see a highly accomplished and successful man with an obese wife.
And, the converse is true. That is, a man who is involved with an overweight or obese woman is seen by other men as a loser. Someone who could not make the cut. And, truth be told, if the brother has any respect for himself then he is embarrassed to be seen out in public with a woman who weighs more than he does.
According to Dr. Ian Smith of State Farm Insurance's 50 Million Pound Challenge and the U.S. Center for Health Statistics two-thirds of American Black women are either overweight or obese. And, the consequences for maintaining overweight or obese status is quite grave for these individuals with long-term chronic illness highly probably if these individuals maintain the excessive weights as they age.
So the epidemic of obesity among American Black women may be another factor that makes many of them unattractive to a large portion of Black men. Although some men have sex with obese women it may be more out of necessity rather than preference.
Most Black men do not want women who are a petite size 6 but we do love the fine, fit, and sexy size 10s. And, becoming indignant about Black men's lack of interest to be involved with 200-plus pound, out-of-shape, overweight women who are above size 18 is an unfair and unwarranted burden for Black women to impose on Black men.
For comparison, the average weight of a linebacker in the National Football League is 225 lbs. Black men should not be made to feel guilty about not being interested in nor romantically dealing with women who think it acceptable to weigh more than a linebacker in the NFL. If American Black women refuse to keep themselves fit, sexy, and healthy for their men; then it is reasonable that Black men will seek to be with women of other cultures who keep themselves fit, healthy, and sexy for their men.
79 Comments:
At July 11, 2010 8:50 PM,
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I know of Black men who will not consider dating women who are under 200 pounds. I grew up around brothers who thought thin women didn't have enough to offer them physically. "Don't nobody want a bone but a dog", "she ain't got enough cushion for me", and "she ain't nothin' but lines and angles", were the comments I heard made about thin women when I was young.
One of the more pleasant traits of brothers is that they appreciate women who are heavier. In fact, there are men across all cultures who prefer big women, and are coming out and rejecting the "loser" status that other men place on them because of their preference. In fact, there are whole web sites, chat lines, etc., devoted to men who seek out bigger women.
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