Tiger School
Does pressure and punishment make you work harder, perform better, reach higher? It's not the most fun way to get things done, but stress encouragement and strict discipline has its place, especially if you believe Amy Chua.
In case you haven't heard, Amy Chua is the author of Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, where she talks about some of her child-rearing practices. Her two daughters were not allowed to have sleepovers or play dates, watch TV, or play computer games. She forced them to play the musical instrument of her choice and spend loads of time practicing. If they brought home any grade less than an A, they were insulted and punished - even for an A-minus.
On one occasion, when her daughter was making mistakes playing the piano, Chua threatened her with no lunch, no dinner, and no birthday presents for the next two to four years. Chua told her daughter she was 'lazy, cowardly, self-indulgent and pathetic."
On one occasion, when her daughter was making mistakes playing the piano, Chua threatened her with no lunch, no dinner, and no birthday presents for the next two to four years. Chua told her daughter she was 'lazy, cowardly, self-indulgent and pathetic."
In another incident, she made her then 3 year old stand outdoors until she performed better at her first music lesson - in 20 degree weather.
Chua's approach - which she says is not uncommon among Asian American parents - is aggressive, ambitious, some say abusive. But it does yield results: one daughter has played piano at Carnegie Hall and Asian American students in general have a reputation for excelling at academic achievement and being a dominant presence in science and math careers. However, this approach may not be as alien an approach as you may think.
Chua's tiger techniques are already in play - in the arena of sports. Coaches often have a reputation for an attitude of tough luck, buddy - if you can't tolerate the tough love and tough tactics that are a requirement to be on the team.
Challenging players, sometimes by insulting, threatening or punishing them is often the rule of the day. To excel as an athlete one is charged with constant daily practice and forgoing hanging out with friends, watching TV, playing computer games. The expectation is for the athlete to bring his A-game - anything less just won't cut it. It's not enough simply to play a good game, you have to win it.
The result is that African Americans have a reputation for excelling at athletic achievement and being a dominant presence in professional sports.
Chua calls herself a 'Tiger mother' because the tiger is a symbol of strength and power which inspires fear and respect.
Only 50% of black students graduate from high school.
Is it time we also took a 'Tiger' approach to academics?
Blog it out: Are we too lax in promoting academic achievement?
20 Comments:
At February 07, 2011 10:03 PM, deebroadnax@hotmail.com said…
I think this article is compelling and thought-provoking. I believe we need to encourage excellence in our children in every area, but I wince at the extreme approach. For me, standing in 20 degree weather for a 3 year old goes beyond "tough love." Is that training or trauma? When we talk about African Americans excelling in sports, is it largely because they have sacrificed hanging out with friends and watching TV or are they inherently gifted physically and daily practice is as a result of internal drivers and channeling social pressures constructively? Yes, push to excel in academics and use tools and techniques that teach dominant left brain kids to train their right brains and vice versa, but I can't help but think of the biblical phrase " parents, do not provoke your children to wrath." Do a longitudinal study to interview the Tiger School children at key milestones towards adulthood and in relationships. How will they fair? Highly trained or highly traumatized?
At February 07, 2011 10:16 PM, Anne H.W. said…
By no means do I agree with the severity of the "Tiger" approach. Eliminating meals, exposure to harsh temperatures and keeping a child from all social activities can be more harmful, in my opinion, than getting a 3.8GPA as opposed to a 4.0. I do, however feel we are lax in promoting academic achievement for our children. We definitely need to let them know that they can achieve more and set the bar higher for them. As educators and parents we know they are capable and we are doing them a disservice by not encouraging them to do their best and improve from there.
They need to face consequences if they don't thrive for excellence in school because they will face them in the globally competitive job market once they are out of school.
At May 27, 2011 7:46 AM, Merisa Davis said…
The numbers don't lie. 47% of our boys don't even graduate High School. Black women are not pushing their children academically. We all are proud of President Obama and his academic achievements...but guess what? He wasn't raised by a Black woman. I don't know of many Black women who get up at 4:00 in the morning to tutor their children. We need to do better. I don't advocate abuse, but we really need more "Tiger Parents" in the African-american community. However, a single mother who is struggling financially frequently is a lackadasicial parent when it comes to making sure her children get the help they need. Our families need to work together so their children excell.
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